How To Rule The World by Tibor Fischer

Fischer was once my favourite British author. Back in the day when The Collector Collector was better than any other comic novel I’d read, certainly better than contemporary fiction by people like Jonathan Coe and less smutty than Tom Sharp, I would rush out to buy his next book, or to put it on my Amazon wish list or whatever it was that existed back then that bears comparison. And then, in 2003, it all went to shit. After Voyage To The End Of The Room I lost the taste for his work, and I actively shunned his new books. It took quite a while for me to find my way back again and only then because he was published by Unbound.

Even now I’m not sure it was worth the effort. This book, a bit of an onanistic rant about the media industry, the decline in journalistic standards, and an old favourite sacred cow, the state of the city of London, feels strained. I’m not too proud to admit I did chuckle out loud at some of Baxter Stone’s acerbic observations, but the plot lurches around like a drunk trying to stay upright without making any headway. There are a host of tired types, like the PTSD cameraman, the clueless exec, the sleazy, pervert film-maker, and the bloated, pompous academic, and the dark cynicism running through, normally something I appreciate, is overly brutal in places and for effect without being sincere. Stone’s pursuit of one last big scoop is another wet fish in the face. In fact, the one interesting plot idea, that there was a lost story, a killer story, stolen along with the safe from his late, one-time friend and benefactor, limps along until it has to be put out of its misery.

In recalling the book I find myself drained of energy and enthusiasm. I don’t think I felt like that at the time of reading but I may have been overly optimistic or wilfully naïve, given my nostalgic feelings – I find it hard to remember grudges and so nearly always fail to keep them – and so now am grumpy and lacking in generosity. One day I’ll find my copy of Under The Frog and give him another chance but for now, I don’t think I’ll be throwing any more money his way.


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